“For each one shall bear his own load.” (Galatians 6:5)
Every parent who has children old enough to be in middle school and above has heard the following appeal, “But everyone else has one or is wearing this or driving this, etc.” And the fact is, at some time or another we have surrendered and made sure that whatever it was they just had to have … they got!
How the trait of entitlement, the sense of being owed something or of deserving something, has found its way into the heart of your child, your spouse, yourself is a discussion that we can have at some other time. The fact is that possessing this ugly and unflattering trait is a serious problem for our society in general, for the workplace, for our families, and even for the church.
The apostle Paul in Galatians 6 is emphasizing by inspiration the need for personal responsibility, whether it is with regard to others, self or most importantly with God Himself. The danger of free will is that we can make the wrong choice. When a person, young or old becomes the center of their own universe then everyone else in their world is just a supporting actor while they get all the glory, notoriety, etc. The ‘I … Me … Mine … Myself’ story is not a pleasant story to read and the ending is anything but rewarding!
Evidence that supports this plague is abundant. When every player and every team in any competitive situation gets a trophy because we don’t want anyone feeling inferior … when our sons and daughters are not in the starting roles and we act up because we feel they deserve to be … entitlement has found its home.
There was an older preacher who recently passed away in a car accident when he was about to make some point in his lesson that he wanted to ‘camp out’ on, would hook his thumb in his pants pocket, step out from behind the pulpit, and exclaim with great emphasis: “Brethren, this ought not to be!”
Folks, it ought not to be that:
- Young people don’t know how to say or refuse to say, “please” or “thank you!”
- Young people don’t know how to be or refuse to be courteous and kind to others.
- Young people don’t know how or refuse to be respectful to their parents or even grandparents!
Now don’t misunderstand the intent of these words. There are young people who do know how to be mindful, respectful and courteous and they are so refreshing, but even that number is diminishing. And while we are at it, a legitimate case could be made in the lives of many adults “that this ought not to be!”
This notion of “I want it now” is just not a sterling character trait, is it! Instant gratification is not our friend. Perhaps as parents and even grandparents, we are afraid to say “NO” for fear we will fall out of favor with our kids or grandkids! Ladies and gentlemen, parents and grandparents were never intended by our Lord to be “best friends” of those we have been blessed to bring in, guide and influence in this world! We will answer for failure to “bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”
There is no doubt we should say “YES” to our kids and grandkids when it is appropriate and right! Why? Because we have the equal responsibility to say “NO” when it is NOT appropriate and right!
We cannot think that we can somehow live out our lives through our kids or in some way give them all that we didn’t have. There are life lessons they must learn to handle and we do them a tremendous disservice if we just “fix” everything for them.
There is an old English proverb which says, “A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor.” It will be challenging enough for our young people to successfully weather the storms of life with all of its challenges and pleasantries. Choose to help equip our young to be people of integrity, compassion and service to God and others rather than people who are selfish, spoiled, and indifferent to the needs of others and rebellious to God and His will!
“For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life.” (Galatians 6:8)
Bill Fairchild, Jr.
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